Points Along a Line

I recently attended a service at my place of religious worship. This particular service occurs annually and recreates a New Orleans funeral. The idea behind this is that we are burying 2008 and welcoming 2009. It is a wonderful event with an authentic New Orleans Jazz Band, hundreds of congregants, and a great deal of energy.

While sitting their with my two boys, I was hit with a bit of time-space distortion. It felt to me as only a short time ago since I last sat through this service (which in reality took place a year ago.)

It got me thinking about time and moments. I pictured the two services as two distinct points drawn on a piece of paper. I then mentally drew a line connecting the points. Why in my mind did the two services appear so close together? What about all the other points along that year-long line?

The impact of this was a reminder to pay more attention. To live more in the moment. To stop waiting.

Coincendentally (I think) a blog I read posted this quote soon after: “Stop waiting for happiness. Happiness is right here, right now!”

We are so often focused on the “end” that we miss the importance of the “means.” I for one will be working on creating points along my lifeline.

Moments, memories, and meaning. Happy New Year.

I’m sorry, what did you just say?

I got off the phone with my wife about an hour ago.  She was just checking in and was telling me about her plans for the day. I had just remembered something I wanted to tell her and started to ring her back when it hit me – I couldn’t remember what she said she was doing today and if she would answer the phone at home or on her mobile. Didn’t she just tell me this only an hour ago? Is my memory failing me as I get one year closer to 40? Or, was I not listening when she told me?

We are all guilty of multi-tasking. Despite trying to rationalize it as being productive, it has been proven to make us less efficient and, when conversing with someone, less attentive.

Here’s a top 10 list from the Dumb Little Man – Tips for Life blog to help improve our listening. Now, if I can just remember where I left my keys…

1. Minimize both internal and external distractions. You can’t always get rid of a headache, but you can close the windows if the driver of a truck is outside revving his engine.
2. Adjust your listening to the situation. If you’re listening to a lecture for an exam in Biology class, you’ll want to pay closer attention than if you’re watching the local news. In the former situation, you’ll probably take notes.
3. Show you’re listening by your nonverbal communication. You might nod, shake your head, or raise your eyebrows. Adjust your posture accordingly. Make eye contact.
4. If you’re listening to a speech or attending a business meeting, determine the most important points and develop a method to remember them. You might repeat them mentally or even jot them down briefly.
5. When you’re listening to a friend with a problem, demonstrate empathy. Show her you understand what she is going through.
6. Realize that people don’t necessarily want you to solve their problem. They may simply want to share how they are feeling. Save advice for another time, unless you’re asked for it.
7. Don’t interrupt. Let the person finish what he is saying before you explain your point of view or ask questions.
8. Don’t prejudge a person’s message by the way he looks. You can learn something from almost anyone.
9. Stay focused on the subject. It’s easy to let your mind wander, especially if the subject isn’t important to you. Train yourself to concentrate.
10. Remain clearheaded, even if the topic is emotional. Perhaps someone is discussing the victories of the recent election, and you were passionate about a losing candidate. When emotions become involved, you may end up in the middle of a shouting match, which will resolve nothing. Present your points calmly. You’ll gain credibility by doing so.

Blogs, Blogs, Everywhere There Are Blogs

Just the facts, ma’am.

A recent Technorati report provides us with some interesting stats on the Blogosphere:

• 133 million blogs have been indexed by Technorati since 2002
• Only 7.4 million of those blogs have posted in the last 120 days
• 1.5 million have posted in the last 7 days

The numbers are quite interesting for a number of reasons.

1. They show the great enthusiasm surrounding blogging, if not the ease in which one can get started (take for instance how easy it is to start a BlogCentral blog.)
2. They indicate that the initial enthusiasm becomes subdued overtime after the ideas run out or the blog loses its place on the owner’s priority list or the owner realizes that it is a bit difficult to generate content on a consistent basis.
3. The numbers provide a peek into why as consumers of information we can feel overwhelmed with keeping up on the continuing influx of data.

Until recently, ‘the Blogosphere’ referred to a small cluster of geeks circled around a single tool. Now it refers to hundreds of millions of people using a vast warehouse of tools that allow people to behave increasingly online like they do in real life. We have entered the Age of Normalization in the Blogosphere.

Shel Israel
Social Media writer & speaker co-author, Naked Conversations
globalneighbourhoods.net